Just Not a Dog Lover

Over the past 18 years of my life I have had plenty of pets only one of which I have had a good relationship and experience with. The dog I grew up with Roxanne, was an awesome dog...she did nothing she would just mop around and sleep. She kept to herself and I loved it, she also made for a nice pillow if you wanted to watch TV laying down on the ground which was a nice perk. After Roxanne I went through a series of childhood pets, I had 2 goldfish, 1 gerbil, 1 hamster, and 1 frog (I may have had more but these are the ones I remember).
The first of these pets were the goldfish. I got them from getting the winning gumball at a pet store and so because I won my parents had no choice but to let me get them. I was in the 1st grade at this time but I took care of those fish like they were my own flesh and blood. I would clean the tank all the time, make sure I fed them at the same time everyday. Because I grew so attached to them, I wanted to have a play-date with them just like I would have with friends, but I even in 1st grade knew fish couldn't breathe out of water. So, I got the idea to fill the bath tube and swim with them in there, I grabbed a snorkel and goggles and I was ready to go. As I was playing with my fish, I thought that since I'm in the bathtub might as well kill to birds with one stone and washed up so I wouldn't have to take a bath later on. That was the mistake...I guess after going through the motions of using soap and shampoo, the water got cloudy and I forgot that i brought my friends in the tub, so not thinking about them I got out opened the drain and went to dry off. They didn't survive.
My gerbil Vedder, who I named after Eddie Vedder the lead singer of Pearl Jam, again I took very good care of was probably my favorite pet after Roxanne. We would play together and he would run around in his little clear ball, we were peas and carrots. One night however, I had to go out with my parents and had to leave Vedder home, I wasn't worried though because my little brother would be home and my aunt was babysitting him. When I returned I went to go look for Vedder, only to find that his ball was at the bottom of the basement stairs in half. Vedder had got out of his ball...never to be found again.
My hamster's, I will admit, death was completely my fault. After all these tragedies, I got careless with my pets and began to view them more like toys. My hamster's name was Whiskers, and I loved to play hide and seek so when my brother didn't want to play, sometimes I would play with Whiskers. So what I would do is I would hide him at night and by the time I came home from school usually I would remember where I put him but I would just pretend I didn't. One day however, I guess I was a tough day in 2nd grade and when I came home I completely forgot where Whiskers was. I eventually remembered about 3 weeks later...it was too late.
My frog was similar but not my fault. One day in 3rd grade I came home and my mom asked me if it was time to get more crickets for my frog. I had no idea what she was talking about. She continued to press me about feeding my frog and taking care of it, so when I told her I didn't have a frog. She walked me upstairs where we were greeted by a frog starved to literally skin and bones. To this day I never remember getting that frog.

Serving on Mission Trips

People always spread this light on mission trips as a time when people need to be serious and cant joke around...I just never understood that. I love mission trips and really put my heart and soul into them, in fact that's what I plan on making my career. In the same breathe, I love having fun and sharing a good laugh. On my second mission trip, the summer going into my freshman year of high school I went to Mississippi. The trip was great we got a lot done, made some really great friendships and I believe truly had a lasting impact on the community. After we spent our time in the mission field we came back to New Jersey and had a two day debriefing period.
One thing that we learned about cultural differences between Mississippi and New Jersey is that fireworks are legal in Mississippi, so of course there was a need to bring back some of the culture we had been in contact with over the past month back home. In our two day debriefing period, days were much more bland then the past month we had experienced and with our prizes we had brought back from Mississippi, a couple of the guys from the team and I decided to add some flavor to the last night.
We waited til around 1 a.m. and snuck out of the room with our hands full of gun-powder filled goodies. We came up with a plan to surround the girls tents with the fireworks and an escape route into the woods so we wouldn't get caught. We after we carefully placed them around the tent site, we got into place and waited for the specific time we were going to set them off. The time came and in order to signal everyone to light the fuses I screamed, "The British are coming! The British are coming!" With that the night sky illuminated with red, green, and blue only to quickly be interrupted by the "pop, bang" of the explosions. Screams followed the explosions but we wasted no time and quickly ran into the woods. The team leaders could be heard running out of their tents and gathering to discuss what happened. We had to wait hours before they went back to their tents but were never discovered!

WWF Takes the Streets of Wyckoff

My best friend Tyler and I hang out a lot. I can't even consider it "hanging out" any more because I feel like my house is just as much his as it is mine, kind of like having a brother. For example there have been multiple times I have come home to find Tyler watching TV...in fact, he has been at my house (when I'm not there) and invited people over because he was bored. So like brothers do when someone the family has guests (friends) so do we and usually we take it way over the top.
T.J. is a kid we've known for a long time, I've know T.J. since 2nd grade, Tyler met him some where around 7th grade but was and is very close with him nevertheless. T.J.'s parents went out of town for the weekend and he was staying at my house, Tyler and I saw this as getting a new toy on Christmas morning, you're just so excited you almost forget to play with it. I can't remember Friday too much, I think it was pretty uneventful. But on Saturday we headed over to the lacrosse fields to throw around. Of course dares made there way into our day of fun. First T.J. dared Tyler to hit a goose with a lacrosse ball, which he did...the goose died I think. T.J. later missed a ball that ended up bouncing to the parking lot where it left a nice dent in the side of a red sports car...we decided to leave after that. The day got crazier and crazier, setting off M-80s (little fireworks) and then not knowingly setting off real fireworks and a bunch of other little things here and there.
Night came and the day was winding down but we still had so much energy so Tyler and I came up with the idea to stage a fight on the busiest road in town. T.J. agreed. We headed down to the main road Tyler and I threw on all black clothes because we were going to be the muggers. We all talked the plan over one last time and the stage was set. So T.J. ran out towards the street and we ran after him and caught him and gave him the worst fake beating he had ever received. A car passing by however did not think this was funny and ripped his car on to the side street we were on. He got out of the car and started screaming at Tyler and I so we took off...we probably won't be staging too many fights after that.

Not Once but Twice

In my sophomore year of high school my best friend and I decided to start a Bible study run out of his house on Sunday nights for our friends. The Bible study was great, everyone was getting really into it and the guys really seemed to enjoy coming out and discusing religion and spirituality Rarely did we ever Tyler and I get to share what we had prepared for the week but we were perfectly content with the passion filled discussions that took the floor over our Scripture reading. We would usually meet for a total of 3 and a half hours, an hour of which was reserved for dinner which we got a restaurant owner who attended the church we went to provided for us week in and week out (probably the real reason the guys would come out), an hour and a half of "Bible study" or religious discussion, and the last hour to just hang out and play video game or whatever was desired.
Of course me being me, as you have read throughout past weeks never steps down from a bet. So when one night, when I was dared to jump on the treadmill at full speed at agreed. The guys and I walked downstairs where the treadmill was and turned it on. I watched the miles per hour increase as Kevin was hysterically laughing in anticipation for the stunt about to be performed. Finally at 15 MPH the treadmill reached its top speed and I mounted the sides and readied myself. A bunch of the guys gathered around and Kevin got the camera on his phone ready. I braced my self hopped off the sides and planted my feet on the tread. My body shot off. I remember thinking, "wow that hurt a lot more than I thought it would" which was drowned out in the laughter of my friends. After everyone got settled back down I asked to see the video that Kevin took...he didn't save it. To this day I don't know why I did, but I did it one more time, this was the product.

Ms. Charles...this is Mr. Morgan

My freshman year of high school I had an English "teacher" by the name of Megan Charles. It just so happened that most of my friends had the same class together and if you haven't noticed already...we aren't the most well behaved kids. To put how bad the class was, Miss Charles would literally cry on most days, we had to move classrooms for various reasons countless times (one day it was 3 different classrooms in one 44 minute period), we would have themed parties every Thursday, and I had literally well over 200 detentions (I set the record 5 in one day) and I only attended one. Now it's not like we were that horrible, she was seriously mentally unstable. At times she would come into class and just say she was sick and go to sleep, so it was no surprise that she was fired the year after our class.
About in the middle of the school year she told me that she was going to call home. I just laughed and say "yeah...OK" because she used this threat often, but never followed through, much like the "detentions" I received. So I was sitting at home with my best friend, Tyler, on a Saturday afternoon when all of a sudden the phone rang. Blocked number (she was paranoid that kids would find her number and stalk her or something, but earlier in the year my friend T.J. thought it would be a good thing to have so while she was out of the classroom he called his phone from her phone and got the number). I didn't think anything of it so I picked it up.
"Hello?"
"Ryan. This is Ms. Charles, I have called to speak to your parents."
I couldn't believe she actually called, but my parents weren't home it was just Tyler and I.... Bing! Light bulb! "Oh...OK. Let me get my dad" I said sadly. I put the phone down and ran into the other room to tell Tyler who was also in the class that Megan (Ms. Charles) was on the phone asking for my dad. After laughing for a while I told him that he was going to be my dad and talk to her. He like I thought it was an incredible idea and immediately said yes. They got on the phone and proceed to talk about me and my behavior. Tyler (Mr. Morgan) was furious and told Ms. Charles that there is no need to worry about my behavior anymore that he was going to take care of it...he also took the time to go through the ways in which he would "beat my ass". After about 45 minutes of this I heard a car pull into the driveway...it was the really Mr. Morgan. Tyler and I ran upstairs still on the phone with Ms. Charles trying desperately to end the conversation. I was caught my dad was coming upstairs to change after his day at work and Ms. Charles would not stop talking to Tyler (Mr. Morgan) now about a parent teacher conference. I had to come clean so I took the phone as my dad walked into my room and told Ms. Charles that she could talk to my real dad now. I gave my dad the phone and walked out of the room.
In hindsight I think I shouldn't have picked up the phone....

The Deception of Mr. John Klinert

In the winter of my junior year of high school Kelly Klinert's house was the spot to hangout at. Her house not only was enormous (when I would sleep there I had my own bedroom with a study and bathroom) but had an indoor pool, an arcade, and a really nice lounge room to hangout in. One December day, on a Friday after school we thought it would be a great idea to just go directly to Kelly's and start the weekend off early. Only a couple people went over in the day but we intended to have many people over that night. When we arrived at Kelly's house we quickly came to realize that we were the only ones in the house, her parents were no where to be found. Myself along with the 4 other people that were there (Kelly, Marc, Victoria and Juliana), thought nothing of it and proceeded to relax like we would otherwise. Around 9 o'clock, literally when we were just about to leave to go to our friend Gen's house for a party, Kelly's dad came home. None of us thought it was a big deal that we were there without parental supervision, but I guess we were wrong.
Mr. Klinert must have heard us talking and laughing downstairs, because he called Kelly up to talk and within 30 seconds the 4 of us left downstairs could hear screaming. Kelly was yelling at her dad and her dad back at her for having us over the house. About 5 minutes of this went by before Mr. Klinert came downstairs. "Kelly is not going out tonight guys so why don't I drive you home."
Absolutely freaked out I told him that it was no problem and Victoria had a car so we could all just go home with her so he wouldn't have to drive. Mr. Klinert being as intelligent as he is responded by saying that New Jersey law does not allow for teens with provisional licences to drive with more than two in the car...and we were a group of 4. What could I say to that? I still don't know how I ended up being the one to drive with Mr. Klinert but it happened. I got in the car...and like a 5 year old I sat in the back seat, he then told me that I could have the privilege of sitting in the front passenger seat. And with the argument that just happened with Kelly and him, I was not going to decline. As we started driving towards my house I received a text message from my buddy asking when I would be heading over to Gen's house for the party (which I had completely forgot about), but me being as smart as I am quickly responded to the text message saying I was being driven over now. I decided that I would tell Mr. Klinert that I lived on Kingston street, which just so happened to be the street that Gen lived on (Mr. Klinert didn't know this). As we were driving he was asking me about the lacrosse team and how we were going to be, and what classes I was taking in school all I answered not putting much thought into because I thinking about the task at hand. As we pulled on to Kingston street I was looking around to tell him which house was "my" house...I couldn't say Gen's because there would defiantly be kids and cars in the driveway. I just picked a random house, thanked Mr. Klinert and got out of the car...but he didn't leave and I couldn't go in this random house. Bing, light bulb went off, and I thought to myself I'll just walk around back. After about 5 minutes or so I left like the coast was clear and I began my jog over to Gen's house.
I got past about 5 or 6 houses when all of a sudden I heard, "Get in the car!" I jumped and turn to see Mr. Klinert and his black BMW. "Oh, come on! Just let me go," I responded. But I had no choice so I got in the car...the front seat this time. He began freaking out on me, asking me if I even played lacrosse and if my name was in fact Ryan Morgan, even though I had meet him numerous time before but that didn't seem to matter. This time I thought it would be best to tell him where I actually lived and he dropped me off there. I thought that maybe after time I would be able to leave and go to Gen's but that didn't happen. Mr. John Klinert sat in my driveway for 40 minutes (seriously) and my night was over.

"Call 911!!!"

When my brother, my sister and I were younger...we would always come home from school and pull pranks on my mom. My sister is much older than Ben and I so she had the responsiblility of "watching" us but in hindsight I think we watched her. We would always do things like crazy glue her shoes together, or decorate the outside of the house with her bras.
My next door neighbor was in high school at the time and was looking to pursue a career in special effects, he worked at a haunted house and did make up for plays and things like that so he was pretty polished in his trade. So one day we decided to take advantage of his skills and use them to mess with my mom. After school we walked home and headed over to Sean's house (the neighbor), and let him get to work. I was a very good fake crier so I landed the role to be the victim in our prank. Sean began to make a huge gash across my face with blood running out, at suprisingly for a non-professional, looked pretty professional. My mom would come home every day right at 5 o'clock so we knew exactly how much time we had. Sean finished with about 10 minutes til 5 so we got into position. Sean had a long set of brick stairs that lead up to his house so we decided that the story was, I fell down the stairs and split my head open....
Just then my mom pulled on to the street and I quickly laid down and let the crying begin. My mom hearing this slammed on the breaks right in front of Sean's house and ran up to me, so I screamed louder. She saw the cut on my face and looked to my sister Kim, yelling at her to call 911. Kim who knew that the whole thing was fake had her face burried in Sean's shoulder laughing but the way her shoulders were bouncing one could easily mistake it for crying. My mom was still going nuts, I think she thought the severeity of the wound might have been life threatening. So Kim went over to her and told her it was fake and the cut was just make-up. This didn't registier with my mom yet, who was looking for her cell phone to call 911. So I got up and started to wipe the cut off, laughing saying it was just a prank.
My mom did not find this funny, she without saying a word marched across the street to the house and locked all the doors. For about 24 hours, I was locked out of my house with a huge gash across my face.

One Cardboard Box = One Crazy Night?

My friends and I love pulling pranks. I think there is nothing funnier than seeing one happen, unless it is happening to you. We use to go a little over the top with some of the pranks, but they were all in good fun. That was before the robbery.
My friends Tyler and Kevin were over one night and we were board so we decided to head down to a strip mall that is just through the woods from my house. Maybe a 5 minute walk. We got down there not really knowing what we were going to do at 10:30p.m.. It was then when we found the box. There was a cardboard box in perfect condition right outside one of the stores. Tyler's face lit up, "lets stage a robbery!" For some reason we got so excited when he said that and the planning began.
Kevin was wearing a sweatshirt with his name on it from basketball season but it looked exactly like a delivery man's uniform. We decided that to look more professional we would need a receipt book for our delivery...so we picked one up at CVS. Now equipped with the box and the receipt, we were ready to go. West Coast Video (similar to Blockbuster) was still open so that was were the prank would happen.
Kevin walked in with the "box of DVDs", asking for the manager to sign off on the delivery. As he was talking to the clerk, Tyler (who was dressed in all black) busted in the door, yelling "Where is he" in a strong voice. He then ran full speed at Kevin, picked him up and tackled him into a rack of DVDs, grabbed the box and took off out the door. The clerk hurdled over the desk and ran after Tyler, which was silly due to the fact that Tyler runs a 4.5 40 yard dash and quickly disappeared into the darkness. Kevin got up and ran out in the opposite direction. We met up in the back parking lot about five minutes after, laughing hysterically about the craziness of the prank and its success. Shortly after sirens could be heard and 3 police SUVs screamed into to the parking lot. Quickly we regretted the prank and ran with all we had to the safety of the woods coverage, and decided that heading back home would be a good idea.